Parents, Be Encouraged
Why you’re important
In keeping with 1 Thessalonians 5:11, I want to encourage parents and build you up in the good work you are doing as parents. I think most of you know how important you are parents. Your role is important not only to your children. Most significant of all, your role as parents is also important to God.
Your children are not your
possession to do with what you will. The Lebanese-American poet Kahlil Gibran
wrote that our children are not our children.…they come through us but not from
us, and though they are with us yet they don’t belong to us. Psalm 127 at verse
3 tells us that “children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.”
This verse reminds us that
our children belong first to God. God presents each child to us as a gift. It
does not matter the circumstances of their birth. Because nothing catches God
by surprise. He has a place and purpose for every child that is conceived; a
place and purpose for every child that is born. So when you look at each one of
your children, remind yourself that you are looking at a gift from God to you.
Say to your child, “Ah, look at the gift God has given to me!”
When your gift brings you grief
Now, I know there are times when that
child does not seem like a gift. I know there are times
when you’ve wanted to give up on your child. There might have been times when
you had to let them go and hope they would come to their senses someday.
Encouragement #1 Your child is a gift from God.
If this is indeed true, then it means your child has Divine
value and purpose. It also means that you have access to Divine help in raising
your child. We don’t have to raise our children by ourselves. God is with us by
His Spirit. He wants us to raise up children in the image of Jesus Christ. God
wants our children to grow, like Jesus, in “wisdom and stature, and in favour
with God and man” (Luke 2:52). Therefore, He will give us, you and me, the
wisdom, courage, and compassion we need to be good parents in this challenging
century, if we ask Him.
Do you want God to teach you and guide you in how to care for the gift He has given you?
Encouragement #2 Your love unwraps your gift.
God
tells us how we should unwrap our gift, how to love our children.
One
way to love your child is to let your child come to Jesus. Jesus said to suffer
the little children to come to Him and don’t discourage them. Parents,
encourage your child to get to know Jesus, and He will reveal the Father to
them. Don’t push your child toward religion, or even church membership; push
them toward a relationship with the living God who is Father, Lord Jesus, and
Holy Spirit. And don’t stand in their way by the way you live or by how you
feel about the church. Let them know that they have a natural place with this
God who knew them even while they were in your womb. Let your child know that
if they want to understand their purpose on Earth, they have to go to the
Source; they have to go to God, not to you, the parent.
Another way to love your child is to discipline your child so that they understand what is right and wrong, they learn how to make good moral decisions, and they learn how to interact with others. Discipline does not automatically mean spanking or some form of violence. The discipline that our Lord expects parents to give children is similar to the way He disciplines us. God disciplines us out of love, not anger or frustration or retaliation (Hebrews 12:4-12); and the purpose of God’s discipline is to bring about a peaceful person who is well-trained to live right. David tells us in Psalm 23 that God’s discipline is a rod that drives away danger and evil to keep the child safe. God’s discipline is also a staff that the child can grab onto and pull their way up to safety, or be pulled to safety, when they slip or fall.
Still another way to love your child is holistically. About twenty years ago, author Gary Chapman talked about five love languages. These five love languages are
1.
words of affirmation
2.
acts of service
3.
receiving gifts
4.
quality time, and
5.
physical touch
We modern parents are known for expressing our love for our children by giving them gifts or the things they WANT. Oftentimes, the kinds of love our children NEED are positive words that build their confidence; they need to spend quality time with their parents; they need a gentle touch or a warm hug or a firm hand on their shoulder; they need an opportunity to practice unselfishness, to exercise responsibility. Do you know how to love and nurture your child holistically?
Encouragement #3 With God’s help, your child will walk into their purpose.
If
you see your child acting foolishly, going down the wrong road, don’t despair
and give up. Love them unconditionally. Model
right living before them. Teach them enduring values. And the godly seeds that
you plant in them, God will water them and make them grow by His Spirit.
Let me give you three real-life examples of this point to encourage you. There are many more examples, but I will summarize only three for you.
St Augustine
Maybe
you have a child like Augustine. Augustine grew up in the church. But when he hit
his teen years, he left the church and began to live a hedonistic lifestyle,
interested only in seeking and achieving pleasures, especially sexual
pleasures. He had a decades-long affair with an older woman and he fathered a
child out of wedlock. However, Augustine had what we call a praying mother. At
the age of thirty-one he confessed and repented of his sins and became a
Christian. And from that moment God used him mightily to preach and to teach in
the Christian Church. Today Augustine is called St. Augustine and is celebrated
as one of the Church Fathers.
Franklin Graham
Or
maybe you have a child like the young Franklin Graham, the son of Reverend
Billy Graham. Franklin grew up a typical preacher’s kid, attending church and
Christian schools. During his teen years he turned against all that he’d been
taught and took on the life of a beer-drinking, motorcycle-riding rebel. At age
twenty-two he returned to his Christian roots, got saved, and was ordained a
minister. Today he is as well-known an evangelist as his father and is doing
great works in Jesus’ name through the charity Samaritan’s Purse.
Rahab
Or
maybe you have a child like Rahab. She had a good heart. She was smart and
hardworking. But she lived in a way that some in society didn’t approve. She
wasn’t a “believer” but she had spiritual insight. That’s why when the Hebrew
spies came into Jericho she was willing to risk aligning herself with them,
rather than with her own people, when the day of war came. Rahab, a woman of
low occupation, became a devout follower of the Lord God and lived among His people. In fact, she has her own
space in the great “Hall of Faith” in Hebrews 11:31.
St Augustine, Franklin Graham, and Rahab. Whatever changes your child is going through today, parents, don’t grow weary in doing what is right for them. Don’t give up on them today: for in due season, tomorrow when it comes, you shall reap, if you faint not.
Response
Do you have a child who seems to bring you nothing but
pain? Say to that child (no matter how young or old) today: “You are God’s gift
to me and I love you unconditionally. With God’s help, I am going to unwrap you
with my love each day, and you will grow up, like the Lord Jesus, in stature,
wisdom, and in favour with man and with God.” Then hug your child.
Let’s connect
If you’ve been encouraged in any way by this message,
please share it with others and let me know. If you’d like prayers or you have
questions about what was discussed in this blog, email me at sheltonlbeneby@hotmail.com .
Let’s connect so that we can connect the generations.
May God bless you.
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